At some point you realize that it has nothing to do with that burst of bubbles you feel inside when you step into the mirror and realize, “You know what, this melanin quite poppin'.”Maybe not in those words, but you get the point.
Anyway, the guys did grow up like I thought they would.
We can tell so little about the important stuff—the beliefs and values, the hopes and dreams, the sense of humor and conversational style—just from looking.
Why would we rely on so imperfect a measure to rule out huge blocks of people?
Fast forward to years later and I've traded in southern clubs for casual, quaint Brooklyn bars.
The guys are equally degreed and are now introducing themselves with professions like sales, music engineering, real estate, and I own a tech start-up.
People are entitled to their taste and you can’t help who you fall in love with, right? Which maybe doesn’t sound bad, because I mean, they have other preferences, too. I’m talking about all my clients, only 55% of whom identify as white.
Height, religion, career paths, Netflix show most recently watched, the list goes on and on. (This seems as good a time as any to mention that when I say “all my clients,” I do mean clients of all sexual orientations.
I spent my early childhood years regularly getting called a “grease monkey,” “Blacky,” and whatever else people could say to try to change your mind about loving your dark skin.
They’re just thinking about their own personal preferences. It’s cultural, it’s national, and it’s fucking everywhere. Christian Rudder, co-founder of Ok Cupid, writes: Scrolling through Ok Cupid’s blog, you’ll stumble across a myriad of depressing race stats.
“White women prefer white men to the exclusion of everyone else — and Asian and Hispanic women prefer them even more exclusively.” “Men don’t write black women back.” Their gay data reads the same: “Blacks get fewer responses.” Have you closed your browser and crawled into a hole to live out the rest of your days unencumbered by society and its bullshit yet?
Physical attraction is important; you have to want to get in each other’s pants!
“They have said Adam has turned his back and ‘sold out’ on his race for not picking Becka.